OK, you may not believe this but I got one of them working after doing some searching around. The nintendo FAQ tells you to smack it with your hand face down.. Doing some more reading on forums others have been told to drop the wii mote.
After a drop, and what I would consider an abusive throw against a carpeted floor one of the defective wii motes started to fully function again. I preceded to beat the hell out of the third till I was board but no luck.
And I though blowing on carts for the NES made you look crazy.
So now I have two working wii motes and that is enough for me and reaofsunshine to play co-op...
I am guessing people that do not let their wii sit idle do not have this problem.